Jim Denham FACTS

• When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet fo Jim Denham.
• Jim Denham doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
• There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Jim Denham has allowed to live.
• Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Jim Denham.
• Jim Denham does not sleep. He blogs.
• Jim Denham is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
• Jim Denham is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
• Jim Denham counted to infinity – twice.
• There is no chin behind Jim Denham’s beard. There is only another ESB.
• When Jim Denham does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
• Jim Denham is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
• Jim Denham’s hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
• There is no such thing as global warming. Jim Denham was cold, so he turned the sun up.
• Jim Denham can lead a horse to water AND make it drink ESB.
• Jim Denham doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
• Jim Denham gave Mona Lisa that smile.
• Jim Denham can slam a revolving door.
• Jim Denham does not get frostbite. Jim Denham bites frost.
• Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after reading Shiraz Socialist.
• Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Jimtatorship.

Coy TV Researchers Alert

RDF Media have been emailing left wing activists asking them to find families who are activists to take part in a special programme about activist families. However, they’ve been a little coy about other such information, such as the name of the programme.

I’ve just had confirmation that the programme in question is Wife Swap. Why they couldn’t be upfront about this is beyond me; maybe they recognise that no self-respecting progressive would touch that programme with a bargepole. Hence why they are offering £2000 for 10 days’ work, as if this will be able to ‘convince’ people who have principles.

I’m not against participation in TV programmes. At all. On Sunday, the CPGB (Weekly Worker)’s national organiser, Mark Fischer, talked about the difference between Stalinism and Trotskyism for Radio 4’s Broadcasting House programme. And I’ve taken part in news reports for the BBC, ITV and Century Radio in Manchester, as well as very nearly participating in a report for Newsnight about young trade unionism (the report was sadly yanked at the last second). You can listen to Mark Fischer’s BBC appearance on the CPGB’s website.

But I’d be a bit more cautious about taking part in programmes like Wife Swap. It’s sensationalist TV, and entertainment – not current affairs, so there is no need to have any pretense of objectivity, and producers rub their hands in glee at this. They are edited to high heaven to project an image that the producers and editors think will get the most ratings. Therefore, if a family of socialists took part, no doubt they’ll be portrayed as raving loonies (and not of the Screaming Lord Sutch type) who weave yoghurt and go around being rebels without a cause.

Avoid.

Never mind the budget, here’s the…

I am not going to comment on the budget, because quite frankly, I can’t be arsed. Gordon Brown fucks over people like me – low paid, no kids – with what amounts to be a tax hike after the abolition of the 10% base rate of income tax, whilst giving a tax cut to the corporations and business in order to “stimulate growth”. The only “growth” that has been “simulated” is in a particular region of males in boardrooms across the city (because, let’s face it, the City only enters the parts of the 21st century that it likes – equality amongst the sexes not being one of them).

Oh, that was a comment on the budget, wasn’t it? Oh well, the point is that it’s no change from the norm, so I don’t think it’s worth any new comment. Dave Osler has commented more on it over on his blog.

What’s provoked me to write is Times “comment centralist” Daniel Finkelstien is whinging that there are no centre-right rock stars and encouraging fellow wingnuts to help him compile a CD of tunes which wreck the mike in support of the family, low taxes, small government and other such bollocks.

Good luck to him, I say. Rock and roll, as one of his commentators pointed out, is anti-establishment, which is what the centre-right is.  But it’s left me in a bit of a quandry, too, because apart from the Manic Street Preachers (who are a bit crap musically in my view as well as being politically crap – c’mon lads, quasi-Maoism is so 1970’s) and bands like Rage Against The Machine/System of a Down/Green Day which have a fairly limited fan base amongst teenagers in their bedrooms, there aren’t any decent far left bands or tunes since the 1980’s.

So, in response to Finkelstein’s challenge, here’s the KitNotes version: Find me left tunes that have come out since 1990, that don’t include the above bands. They don’t count.  I don’t care what genre they come from, but they must have a radical message.

So, for example, “He Got Game” by Public Enemy with such lyrics as…

God takes care of ol folks and fools
While the devil takes care
Of makin the rules
Folks dont even own themselves
Payin mental rent
To corporate presidents
1 outta 1 million residents
Be a dissident
Who aint kissin it
The politics of chains and whips
Got the sick
Missin chips and championships
Whats love got to do
Wit what you got

… counts, as does, perhaps, “People Hold On” by Coldcut & Lisa Stansfield:

Everybodys looking for a meaning
Everybodys doing their own thing
And nobodys solving the problem
Aint nobody helping each other

Some people give into fear
Some people give into hunger
Some of us live for the future
And some of us wonder

Give a little life, give a little love
Maybe theres enough for everyone
Give a little hope, and a little trust
Maybe theres enough for everyone

… whilst being a bit hippyish,  it’s quite clearly a critique of Thacherism. The person who nominates the best song, and gives the best reason for it’s inclusion, will win a copy of the final CD.

The winner will be announced at the Socialist Bloggers Meetup.  My decision is final (this blog isn’t a democracy, you know) and no arguments will be entered into.

Get to it!

Socialist Bloggers Meetup II

THE KITNOTES SOCIALIST BLOGGERS MEETUP II: THE DAY OF RECKONING

It will take place on SATURDAY, 14th APRIL 2007
Drinking will commence at 1600 (that’s 4pm, folks) until LATE
The location has yet to be decided but it will be in London

Pre-registration is now OPEN (with numbers, I can find a suitable venue)
It isn’t essential but it does mean I can plan – and aren’t we socialists for planning?

You can pre-register by email to socialistbloggers@kitnotes.co.uk

REMEMBER KIDS, DRINKING AND SOCIALISM IS NOT BIG, HARD OR CLEVER. BUT WE’RE ALL THREE, SO THAT’S ALRIGHT THEN

See you there!

Wanted: A decent Eurovision entry

What the hell? Could they not possibly get a more stereotypically gay song?

“Would you like something to suck on for landing, sir?”

Indeed.

Britain, you have no taste.

Quite possibly the worse thing about it all is that Scooch were the best of a bad bunch. We had Cindi singing a ballad which sent me to sleep, has-beens Brian Harvey (’im out of East 17) and Liz McClarnon (’er out of Atomic Kitten), Hawkins and Brown (’im out of The Darkness, ‘er is actually quite talented but the song sucked), Cindi (’oo the ‘ell is she?) and Big Brovaz (actually, we actually realised that they were crap a long time ago, so it’s not going to be any different second time round).

Eh, Morrisey, where were you, you bastard? You PROMISED us a decent Eurovision entry.

Fuck it. I’m going to enter next year. Eh, Stroppy, up for a duet?

Hello world!

Welcome to WordPress.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it and start blogging!

I want one

Commiemobile!

JBlog: “New Labour Denies Rights to Agency Workers”

One word: shocking.

The current agency worker rights regieme is non-existant. Despite what the New Labour mandarins keep telling us, a so-called ‘flexible’ workforce is not good for the economy.  It is inherently insecure. It is usually some of the worst paid work in Britain – the average agency worker in London earns around £6.50 an hour. They are usually either forced or tricked into signing away their holiday and their protection under the European Working Time Directives (it’s shocking in and of itself that Blair had the balls to fight for the British opt-out in the first place).

Because of the precarious nature of temping, agency workers can’t even dream of getting a toe – never mind a whole foot – on the property ladder. They have very little  employment rights as it is.

Don’t get me wrong; temporary work in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. I’ve temped before and no doubt will temp again.

But employment agencies are shysters. They are tricksters, they are bullies, they are theives, they are incomptent buffons, only motivated by their desire for more profit or bigger bonuses or commission, every last one of them.  They simply cannot be trusted. If a recruitment consultant tells you it’s 3pm, check your watch. Not just to see how they lied but to see if it’s still there, too.

The ‘flexible labour force’ benefits capitalism – not the workers. Don’t be fooled otherwise.

Come along

The case for socialist feminism: a dayschool on class, capitalism and women’s liberation organised by the Alliance for Workers’ Liberty

10.30am-5pm, Saturday 21 April 2007, London (venue tbc).

Waged £5, unwaged £2.50, including a pack of materials on socialist feminist ideas. There will be a creche provided.

Followed from 6pm-late by a fundraising social for the Organisation of Women’s Freedom in Iraq at the Ivy House, 8-10 Southampton Row, London WC1B 4AE (less than five minutes from Holborn tube). Waged £5, unwaged £3.

Discussions will include:

- What is the relationship between class, gender and other oppressions?
- How do socialism and feminism fit together? Is women’s liberation possible under capitalism?
- How can we get the labour movement to fight for women’s rights?
- The women’s movement of the 1970s and 80s: what we can learn
- The case of Iran: feminist attitudes to religious oppression, feminist attitudes to war and imperialism
- Porn, prostitution, sex work: how can we fight oppression without allying with the right?

For more information ring Sofie on 07815 490 837 or email Cathy cathyn56@hotmail.com

See www.workersliberty.org/women for more info.

Socialist Bloggers Meetup II

It is coming soon.
Give me the dates you would like.
Let us do this thing.

EDIT: Turned it into haiku instead.